Hope's Expiry Date

Written by Payge Stanley

 Photograph by  Xavier Sotomayor

Photograph by Xavier Sotomayor

The distance between where she wants to be and where she seems to  be only increases.
As the stress piles up around her, her hope only decreases.
She’s seeing no way out.
Losing sight of those she loves and it seems they don’t hear her shout.
Questioning who really cares, when she’s always there for the ones who need her, yet the ones who knew her best don’t seem to see that she’s bleeding.

Do I really hide it that well?
Behind the goals I  complete?

Because there’s another list she’s ticking off and its the doubt circling her head with defeat.
Hoping someone will notice, the same way she does in others, because the things that keep her afloat seem as though they couldn’t be any further from her.
She needs them to stay but is there anything she can do not to drown?
She’s stuck in a wheel of highs and lows yet she can’t seem to stop running to let it slow down.
Weighed down by her own expectations of herself because her enough is never enough.

They tell me to get rid of people who don’t value me, but how do you get rid of yourself?